“A friend hears the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails.” – (author unknown)

 

We liked all kinds of sacred music and Broadway show tunes, but overdosed on Southern gospel, because of its bold, colorful imagery. It fit with our use of metaphors. We were, after all, “The Ranchers” who lived at “The Ranch.”

At one point, when a Gaither recording was on, I heard Mother boldly articulating  “fathomless billows of love.”  I looked to the screen and then I looked at her to see if she was reading the sub-titles. But no, she was folding laundry next to Dad – while singing her inner joy from deep in her being: Fathomless billows of love. 

We had literally hundreds of favorite songs in books of sacred music, spirituals, and hymns set to jazz accompaniment – from which we sang her theology every evening at the piano. From these daily periods of renewal and rejoicing and – as science now tells us – hearts beating as one, she would occasionally say as we left the piano, “I’m so glad I paid for those music lessons.”

“The world broken-hearted . . . dreamlessly passing the long empty days”

In this broken world of  2020, these lyrics by Bill and Gloria Gaither – found in our music collection from the ranch – seem especially fitting for our readers in the dementia community and beyond:

Before the song started, the world broken hearted
Was dreamlessly passing the long empty days
Then a dark, lonely hillside was spangled with light
And a song burst into the night.

He started the whole world singing a song
The words and the music were there all along
What the song had to say was that love found a way
To start the world singing a song.

“And a song burst into the night”

Not only did we grow a huge repertoire of older songs, many of which Mother, the oldest child of a minister, would have heard since being carried in her mother’s womb.

But a significant aspect of our music experience was that, while we enjoyed the music which we had sung for many years, we also added considerably to our repertoire – constantly learning new material.

Once the new material had become an “old favorite” – something which happened quickly – we would definitely come back to it. But we constantly moved on to learning yet another new number.

“The words and the music were there all along”

Initially, when I set up my office in their home on the edge of town, the prime focus was nutritional – nurturing Mother back to well-being after working with her physician to isolate the offending medication.

Once she was up and about again after being very sick, we immediately began our nightly routine of “making beautiful music together.” When I witnessed how she thrived on it, the routine became one which was easily sustainable. Our mutual enjoyment reinforced the importance of keeping it as a priority in our daily schedule.

“Love found a way – to start the world singing a song”

Music-as-medicine kept us grounded, fortified our determination, reenergized us on a daily basis, and lifted us – dare I say?  – to celestial heights.

Visitors and guests who stopped to see Mother were invited to join us in singing along at the piano as we introduced our guests to the latest new piece of beautiful music we were learning.

Just how extensive our repertoire would become as we learned new material would be known only after years of singing together. Adding jazz, swing, blues, rag, and waltz accompaniment brought us pure enjoyment – and a feeling of accomplishment. We both brought a high energy level to this time together.

Mother’s ability to superbly-articulate the lyrics – both new and old – continued for a period of close to 11 years following the diagnosis.

Recent research:
What you appreciate appreciates

Recent studies, including research at the National Institute on Aging, have now found that people diagnosed with Alzheimer’s have far greater capacity to learn new information than was previously known.

Credits:

Song lyrics and sub-titles in above article:  Bill & Gloria Gaither – He Started the Whole World Singing

Images include some who sang with us – from upper left to right: Aunt Pat, Aunt Dorothy, Paul, Uncle Max, Aunt Ruth, Mother (center), Mary Ann, Suz, Sally, Bill… Aunt Pat with Mother… Indiana cousins: Aunt Christena, Denise, Joanna, Olivia… Lauren, our Literary Companion finishing music therapy degree… Suz… Bets… Karen, our Literary Companion… Randy, Mary… Kari… Randy… Uncle Max (2 photos)… Bets, Randy, Suz… The Ranchers… Cousin Rach… Mary, our Literary Companion… Alyssa (great granddaughter).

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This post contains excerpts from an early blog post in our magazine, Our Essence – Singing the Journey, which originally appeared here on January 3, 2020. 

Author:  Susan Troyer